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“Sugitaru wa nao oyobazaru ga gotoshi.”

-Author Unknown

Essentially, the above Japanese proverb translates into “Let what is past flow away downstream.” If not everyone, many people have experienced at least a few situations in their lifetimes in which they felt as though they would be bound never to forget (or in many cases, forgive). Whether the case be involved with something of a more negative or positive atmosphere, at some point, one must come to the realization that some things simply need to be let go. Though the actual process may be difficult sometimes, the effort is truly worth it, for in the end a great weight is lifted from ones spirit/mind.

Dwelling on the past is no way to help oneself get over particularly negative incidents. Examples of such events broadly range from things such as being bullied, failing an important exam, separating from a spouse, or the death of a close individual or even a pet. All events have some sort of impact, but encumbering oneself with them or being set into a foul or depressed mind-frame by doing so is not the solution to moving on. Though this may be slightly blunt, the past is over and behind us. People do not live for the past, life is aimed towards and will continuously move to the future. Though some things from past memories may affect us, we should simply take the lesson learned from them, and apply them in the future.

In many cases, people find themselves holding a grudge against someone. This is a common occurrence in all ages and types of people, whether they admit to it or not. The process of holding a grudge is much more harmful to the person forever grasping those feelings, than it is to the person they are directing it to. However, grudges have a tendency to transform into revenge. Revenge in essence, is detrimental to both parties. Once this is acted out by the original grudge holder, the victim usually takes this negatively, and therefore plans to get back at the original culprit. Holding a grudge is only the start, because once it manifests into a plot for revenge, it creates a detrimentally endless cycle of hurt and hate. In order to keep these types of occurrences from even beginning, one must first learn to forgive and forget, which inevitably ties into not dwelling on the past.

As mentioned in the latter, “Sugitaru wa nao oyobazaru ga gotoshi” translates into “Let what is past flow away downstream.” Notice that the author of this quote does not intend for us to forcibly drown our memories out of sight and mind, but to simply let them flow away. Some memories are indeed important (even if they were negative experiences) because one can learn from them and gain wisdom. It is when one utilizes their memories in a harmful way (causing self turmoil), that needs to be looked out for.